Monday, June 15, 2009

Morning in Vana'diel: It's 4AM. Do you know where your Moogle is?

Morning in Vana'diel is your daily dose of FFXI and all things Vana'diel. Give us your thoughts on the interesting topics of the day! Today, it's time to consider just how evil your Moogle really is.

Your Moogle, your friend, constant house companion, ready to supply you with your equipment, switch your jobs, and even has your mail for you. Great, wonderful creatures, right? I'm not so sure. First of all, how does your Moogle get from your home nation to Whitegate faster than you? They are always there as soon as you zone in, so they must have gotten there somehow, and it's faster than you can go. If they really are your best friend, then how come they don't just take you with them when they hop between Mog Houses? Maybe they just like to mock you with their secret teleportation abilities? I mean seriously, this is the guy you entrust everything in the world to, and they don't even mention the fact that they can just appear in any Mog House they wish. I mean you let them see you naked, and in fact, if you are changing jobs then they make you get completely undressed. Kinda weird fetish there if you ask me, and they don't even hide it. As soon as you are naked they start spinning around all giddy.

And what about your equipment? Where do they put it? Unless you put your stuff on a mannequin you never see where your Moogle puts your gear. And what do they do with it when you are gone? Do they pull it out and play dress up? Do they have that weird Japanese fascination with dirty panties? You just don't know, but they are always waving and have that weird shit-eating grin on their face as soon as you come home. And whats with the mail? They control your delivery box, do you think they are beyond looking through your mail? I wouldn't put it past them, that is for sure.

And what is with that ball on their heads? Yeah, that's not creepy at all!

Are Moogles those cute little buddies, always helpful and ready to assist? Or are they really evil, perverted assholes, just laughing at you as soon as you zone out? Why won't they take us when they port between Mog Houses? Are they out to get you? Leave a comment and tell us what your Moogle does late at night while you are sleeping!


Preciouskitten said...

All these things are creepy and annoying about moogles. It totally weirded me out when I first started playing, before I'd done the exit quest, and he'd ask me if I was leaving before he'd let me open the door! I was all "OMG, the moogle has me trapped in my house!" Seriously, I hated him for weeks.

Then, when I was gardening and he's all "I'll watch your stuff, Kupo!" and then he doesn't actually tend the plants AT ALL and they die. I have to do everything myself. Not sure what that squinty eyed pig is really there for.

Starcade, now from Leviathan said...

Moogle Kupo d'Etat might answer some of those...

Renarudo said...

All my moogle does is "check" on my Contraband when I'm not in Bastok. And even then, I have to remind his bitch ass to do everything for me.

samsol the disturbed cabbie said...

You ungrateful bums...without mr. Moogle, you wouldn't have a mog safe, storage, or should all be praising them and their space saving techniques!