Stranger in a strange land.

I have found that I can not focus on things as well as I once did in game. I think this might have something to do with completing and perfecting quite a bit of what I wanted done in game. I have full Usukane and I am not fully merited on MNK and SAM. There are a few pieces I could do with having still, but they are all purchased pieces and spending gil to buy items although necessary has never been a driving force for me.

I still find it difficult to put together time to level BLM as much as I would like. I know that Iz is a little burned out on BLM at the moment, but I wouldn't mind getting it up a little further. Part of the problem is that we are kind of in between camps, so it is getting a little more difficult to find a place to go or to get XP quickly. Another problem is that we have a lot of things we do in the mean time that consumes time that I would have had in the past for leveling and such.

Salvage for a long time was my main focus, even after getting full Usukane. There are still several Skadi pieces that I want well, pretty much everything but head which sucks and feet that I already have. The body would be very nice I think to TP in because there are many times that I really wish I had more accuracy on RNG and also because it looks really cool. The legs will be part of my RNG gear because the accuracy is almost as good as my AF2 legs, but the other stats are great and if my plan works out after reading up on /SAM and Store TP, I think I will be able to manage a 5-hit build on RNG with E bow. Finally, the hands are excellent WS pieces for RNG. If I do get all these items then I would seriously consider picking up THF again. I am also interested in getting Morrigan's gear and even some Marduk's gear too. There is something about the Salvage gear, even if it isn't that great it is still very appealing to me.

The problem for me is that Salvage is now winding down. My group still goes, but the press to do it is not as active as it once was. Celestria and Blaize are taking a well deserved break from Salvage but consistent tempo of 5 Salvage runs a week used to keep me focused. 3 runs a week doesn't seem to have the same pressing need as it once did. The other thing is that we used to use Salvage as kind of a base point for doing other things like ZNM's or anything else we had planned. It just now feels much less focused and organized for some reason. I think part of my problem is that I go through cycles of enthusiasm and burn-out, but when I was burned out in the past I could rely on other people to help pick me back up. Right now, I am worried that I am going to fall behind or that people are going to move on without me. It's a bit paranoid I guess, but without the structure we had before, I guess I feel like I am just floating in space and relying on other people to pull me back in to do things. That is not how I normally exist as a person, so I am left feeling lonely even when friends are around me.

Meh, /emo.